Sage Isn’t Just For The Turkey!
As you are prepping for Thanksgiving, don’t forget the Sage! It’s not only for the turkey.
Ah…the Holidays!
The smell of delicious foods, seasonal drinks, cozy fireplace, reconnecting, laughter, hugs and kisses, arguments, tension, frustration, and overwhelm.
Whoa…Pump the breaks! That took a turn.
Suffice it to say, nobody activates us like our family. Am I right? Yes, you know ;).
It’s quite amazing how we get with our families and go backward in time like we are 10 years old again- assuming our old roles, regressing developmentally, responding in the patterned habitual, not always helpful, ways.
The unpleasant feelings we experience when we are activated turn quickly into a downward spiral of negativity, a ruined evening. It’s a Saboteur Hijacking, big time!
Talk about a Grand Heist! Here it is folks, just waiting to happen. Our minds and all our positive intentions are gone! Yet another Thanksgiving for the memory books.
Unless…We bring some Sage for us too.
What I mean is bring your wise Self, your awareness, and courage to respond differently, this Thanksgiving.
Here’s the prep work for your Thanksgiving dinner: All recipes require some preparation, so let’s get to it! It’s only Monday, after all.
Sage Thanksgiving Preparation Instructions:
The first ingredient is YOU :
What do you want this Thanksgiving?
What’s most important to you about gathering with family?
Who do you want to be for your family? Perhaps you create a metaphor: “I am the tree topper who sheds light and joy on everyone.”
(Let that be your Holiday mantra and barometer for how it’s going.)What’s truly important to you about the gathering? About the conversations? What is actually not really important, that may seem important?
Secondly, how might you become activated this Thanksgiving?
Which of your Saboteurs may rear their little heads? Perhaps the Judge, judging family members, like Uncle Ed, who will undoubtedly fart during dinner, Aunt Frita and her Trumper views, your sister, Beth, whose kids run around yelling and screaming, etc…Maybe your Stickler wants it all to be perfect or it’ll be a disaster! Perhaps your Pleaser will encourage you to not speak up, or create conflict, and to be sure that no one is uncomfortable (as if you have that superpower!) Oh, then, of course, the Hyper-Vigilant part of you will kick in to be on alert for any potential arguments, etc…You get the idea.
Simply “watch” all the possible highjackings, without judging yourself.
Finally, consider how your wise Self will respond, once activated. This is where you get to symbolically burn the Sage! How will your wise, luving, all-knowing Self respond?
Will you engage your compassion? Your empathy? Perhaps you see this person as their little 5-year-old self. How might their hair have been? How might they have looked? How might they have moved? What experiences might they have had, that brought them to where they are today?
Will you activate your curiosity? Becoming truly interested in what they are saying, asking questions about their viewpoint - Important: keep it clean! Questions without an agenda! Questions to truly learn about this person, not to prove them “wrong” and you “right,” but rather questions that seek to understand the need beneath their position. There is always a need, an aspiration in the underbelly of a stance/a position. What is it for that person?
Perhaps a Sage way to respond includes setting clear and kind boundaries, “Uncle Ed, please go to the bathroom to pass gas.”
On that note, my prep work here is done!
By the way, did you know that when you rub or burn Sage, it intensifies the aroma, it prevails over everything else? Just sayin’…
Wishing you a Sage-filled Thanksgiving!
P.S.
I hope you share in the comments how your Sage Thanksgiving Prep is going! I’d luv to hear from you.
